What’s the MATTER-horn?
Are you feelin’ the BUZZ space ranger???
Why are you Pirates of the Carri-BEIN’ like this ayyee?
Shrek yourself before you wreck yourself…wait nevermind…Disney does not own Dreamworks…well, not yet.
And this is how my blog is revitalized. I experienced a drought in my life.. my desire to write shriveled. I did not entirely lose myself, but I did forget a piece of myself. Misplaced most likely. Somewhere. So I planted some blue flowers. Promise to forget-me-not.
documentation of my neuroses, eccentricities, imperfections, lame puns & other rad bullshit
What’s the MATTER-horn?
photo of ri bread freshman year of college in her natural habitat
I am an expert when it comes to going HARD. Especially in the summer. Woot woot.
I like your Bra-ZEAL. This blog post might change your life. Hence might. Hence zeal. Hence UR MOM.
From Mexico to Vegas– yuh I am not dead bitches believe it or not.
I’d like to dedicate this post to the nine dudes I humiliated myself in front of. Thank you for taking one for the team & I apologize if it caused any emotional damage. What can I say… I fuck up a lot. *shrugs*
THIS DOGGO IS ABOUT TO DRIVE THE TRUCK HAHAHAH NOW DON’T BE STRESSED YUH SILLY GOOSE THIS IS TOO FUNNY TO BE STRESSED LIKE IMAGINE IF YOU SAW HIM IN THE LANE OVER
Ri’s coming your way with AHH-MAZZINNGG tips– as usual. This week’s topic is *drum roll* STRESS!
I’m an expert. What more is there to say? Nothing aye. So check out this blog post because I can make your crush tolerate you. If not, you can brawl with me (stool & Irish pub not included) Buuuttt it’s a money back guarantee!
Heading up north? It can be scary, but don’t you worry. You’re talking to an expert on all things Lumberjack.
Hey everyone! These last few days, you could catch my other half & I scampering around the Pacific Coast (which I initially thought stood for “Peanut Butter” shhh don’t tell anyone). & we were being somewhat reckless by not putting on much sunscreen or drinking […]
Yes, college in fact changes us children emotionally & mentally. Some of us experience transformations- sometimes in the upward direction of maturity & sometimes in the downward direction towards our graves (foreshadowing a young, imminent death). But what about the physical aspect????? Would you like […]
Summer break is your time to relax, yet still simultaneously be productive. It’s a time when you actually have time to get stuff done, but in a casual, stress-free manner. Throughout second semester, we all find ourselves saying “This summer I will…” or “When school […]
Finals are here. & I am out. Yuh feel me? ‘Tis a rough period for most college students. I’m guessing your semester-long disillusionment is fading and you’re finally sober enough to realize your grades aren’t as superb as you last remember? Maybe you’re in a […]
The experience was absolutely indescribable. I can tell you that the euphoria took place Saturday and Sunday night last weekend, but that is it. Words can’t adequately explain April 8th and 9th of 2017. So why even bother trying? Anyone who has been to a […]
There’s nothing more euphoric than a taste of live music. Regardless of the size of the venue or the genre of music, hearing it in person is a one-of-a-kind experience. However, if we aren’t properly prepared for the obstacles that come with attending festivals and […]
Hello, my name is Riley and I am considered a regular at multiple coffee shops. Many baristas remember my order as soon as they see my face in line. Currently, I am cradling a cup of coffee in my hand. Dark roast is running through my veins. […]
My favorite part about California? Awhh thanks for asking. Well, to answer that question even though no one actually cares about my answer, I’d just like to say it’s the ride there. Yeah, yeah, yeah I know that sounds so god damn weird, but I […]
Do you ever make spontaneous decisions? I know for a fact that you know the insane ideas I am talking about. We all have them. But the question is… do you ever follow through with them? Well, my friends and I are crazy. Soooo we often […]
College is a learning experience. It is a zoo, a prison, & a luxurious spa vacation all compiled into one place (10 million miles long, 100 million buildings wide, & lacks any logical pattern of arrangement) for your convenience. There’s always a new face to meet, a […]
Putting together the perfect date to impress the perfect girl is probably more stressful than that time you cried in 15 minute intervals as you frantically tried to teach yourself an entire chapter of math the night before your last test. The perfect date requires three things: […]
It was on January 23rd that I celebrated my birthday– hold up– whoa whoa whoa– but wait a minute.. “Riley’s birthday isn’t on January 23rd… it’s on May 21st.” Exactly. The story takes place this past winter break. Riley, a fashion enthusiast, seized a few good […]
After moving to Flagstaff 6 months ago, I discovered a new dream of mine. It was inspired by the plethora of dog & owner dates I’d watch every Saturday morning through a window at Macy’s European Coffeehouse. I suddenly knew what I wanted in life. I […]
Yes, I am passionate about a few too many things- but is it really that bad to find yourself fascinated by everything &very enthusiastic about life? I honestly don’t think so. Maybe I’m just trying to convince myself that I am somewhat normal. Who knows. […]
December 24th 5 P.M. Christmas has officially started (regardless of what the calendar says). December 24th 5:01 P.M. The anticipation is here- this is when it truly begins. December 24th 6:49 P.M. It’s tradition at my house to open one present this evening, but “just […]
Okay so yes Christmas is about a lot of things- love, appreciation, family, cookies… But lets face it. We can’t act like Christmas has nothing to do with presents (as much as our grateful selves try to convince everyone). Presents are one of my favorite […]
Most people refer to me as “crazy” because I run on my own will and I FRICKIN LOVE IT. I wasn’t born a runner. I wasn’t born with this magical desire to run. I am not a “natural” at running either. Don’t get me wrong, those […]
Hey everyone!!!! Today is Dylan’s 19th date of birth soooooo SHOUT OUT TO HIM!! 21 years away from living in the White House! Instead of hurling a million page biography of our last two and a half years together at you all, I’m just going […]
Hi everyone! This is exciting, yet very awkward because I am not famous and I have no fans. I read that my first blog post is supposed to be interesting & intriguing so people will read my future blog posts, but why would I spend […]